Saying Goodbye

Celebrating with Braden last Christmas.

Last night was all about saying goodbye even if we have been doing this privately for the past few days since Braden's passing.  Now it was time to draw together those whom Braden had touched in his brief life and allow them to make peace, share a story and see our brave boy one last time.  How necessary this is for us and how brilliantly Braden pulled us together without saying a word.  As I watched and welcomed so many this evening with Robert, Chelsea, Rachel, Kelsey and Kiersten by my side it was difficult not to be moved by this power.  Braden's laughing eyes and courageous example give us all hope that we can at least try to be better people.  Last night I saw how Braden reunited friends and family who had not spoken for far too long and how he helped another father gain courage to continue carrying the heavy load of caring for his own profoundly challenged son.  In that room Braden brought strangers together to share stories and cause an entire crowd of people to say "What a beautiful boy!"

So much about saying goodbye is about understanding your place in that person's life and what he or she meant to you.  You already know I was powerfully inspired by Braden but I think I learned much more.  My heart is bigger.  I am more willing to laugh at myself.  I don't need or want to be perfect.  Small things make me happy.  My eyes are more willing to see new things particularly in people.  And I am learning acceptance - just to accept that life is messy and painful, joyful and surprising all in one big lump.

Today brings the final step.  We have been marching slowly towards this over the last few days.  It is a final step.  I know the sun will shine tomorrow, the earth will be damp and ready for spring, the flowers will glow against a chill day and we will all gather together for that last goodbye united by Braden and his reminder to be strong but keep a twinkle in your eye.

We will Braden, we will.

Thank you for all of your support over the past few days. Your kind words will accompany Braden into his next steps. Thank you for giving both us and him the strength to carry on.

Love Forever,
Tosca and Family

Chelsea and her big brother Braden sharing a laugh!

A sunny day with Bob & Braden.