Friday, August 3, 2012
When I entered into this relationship with Rita, I made her swear to me she wouldn't kiss my @$$. I needed truth from her and I needed her to give me exactly what I needed to succeed, not a sweetened up version. I also needed to trust that she would be able to deliver this. If these principles were not firmly in place then there would be no deal.
So how is it going? Is the trust factor holding strong? You don't really know if you can trust someone unless there is a galvanizing moment in which the realization that trust is at work reveals itself. I know for sure trust is at work with Rita and I because Rita pushes me - HARD. She will tell me to pick up certain weights - heavier than I normally use - and get on with a set of chest flyes, super-setted with thrust presses, core work and triceps work. She doesn't hesitate in pushing me into the set. "Pick them up! Get on that ball! Use your core! Get under the 25's and give me a set! You got this! You see, you got this!" She knows what I need and she delivers it. I don't even know what I need at times so she is quite ready to stand up for me and let me have it.
I trust her to do this for me because I need to NOT think about it. I need her to take care of my training and ultimately my nutrition - and she is!!! I hand this over to her gladly but that is only possible because I trust her.
We both know this is a very different journey for me. We both know we are not two women in the gym. We know that Bob is there but that Rita is driving the work, the path, the plan and the routine. We both know Rita is strong for me, while I am a woman who has much to rebuild. Rita takes all of my bits and pieces and puts them to the test knowing I am asking her to give me her everything. As much as I want that from her, she has the chops to give it. Otherwise there would be no relationship.
We are ready to dance. Rita is leading, I am following. I trust her guidance. Period.
From Coach Rita:
What to look for in a personal trainer. I often see lists posted regarding this topic. Almost always mentioned are the trainer’s qualifications, updated courses, experience, past success stories, attention etc. Although the qualities mentioned above are true and important, one of the most crucial and critical traits rarely mentioned is the Trust Factor.
TRUST- The firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.
A relationship cannot be complete, genuine or successful without this powerful 5-letter word. How can a client abandon all previous habits and ideas and throw themselves, their diet and the way they move into the hands of a complete stranger? What about all of the preconceived notions of health and fitness that have been engrained in people’s minds and routines? And as trainer, how do we know that our beloved client is doing the extra stretching, rolling, walking and crunching when we are not with them? How do we know they have chosen the sweet potato over the white one? We don’t know. They don’t know. But what we MUST know and have is TRUST.
Unfortunately (or fortunately), as a coach, we are with our clients anywhere from 1-6 hours a week. That is not a lot in the grand scheme of things. There are another 162hours approximately where our clients may do as they wish. We are not their keepers or their conscience. What we should do, and in my opinion are obliged to do as professionals, is educate them and teach them how to fish in order for them to understand why they are choosing eggs for breakfast instead of Lucky Charms. We are educating, then TRUSTING that they will follow through. This is almost always a step-by-step process, as the trust becomes more prevalent - the adherence, compliance and achieving do as well.
When I was asked to take Tosca on as my client for this amazing tribute, I definitely was honored, but apprehensive and a bit fearful. How could I train, coach, and critique the form, exercise choice and nutritional habits of the Eat-Clean Queen herself? She was taught by The Best and lives, breathes and preaches health. How could I get her to trust my thoughts my doctrine and me?
I have to say that I was relieved and overjoyed when one of the first things Tosca told me was she was ready for a change, needed it more than ever and was ready and willing for anything I threw at her. The BEST thing I could hear. Our relationship started on the right foot. I was able to tell the Queen of Oatmeal herself, that for our specific goal right now, it was time to find an alternate breakfast - she trusted me. When we entered the House of Pain the first week, I had her doing 8 sets of 8 - something never shown to her - yet again she performed and excelled all because of trust. I can also tell you about kettlebells, quinoa, lentils, tofu, reaching failure in the gym, RED WINE, rest days, accepting failure and much more - these all have TRUST written all over them.
Tosca’s trust in me as coach and human being is one of the most flattering and humbling things I have experienced. I am grateful to her on so many levels - she is teaching me a lot about trust, love, relationships and authenticity of the human spirit. Thank you for trusting me Tosca.
Posted by Tosca Reno at 9:34 PM